Open Letter to all those who refuse to knock on my (classroom) door

Dear Fellow Locust Forkians,

I know it makes you feel better to pull on my door before you knock. However, it is going to be locked. It always will be locked. If you feel a need to see my beautiful face, knock kindly. I will politely obligue and open the door in a timely manner. If I am not there in .0048657 seconds please understand, I am on my way. See I hate to wear shoes, I usually am sitting on my fee without my shoes on. Therefore, I must find my shoes, slip them on, and race to the door so you do not feel neglected. I apologize for any inconvience I may cause by keeping my door locked. However, I tried leaving it unlocked and random wondering Jews (aka other people's students) ended up in my classroom without my realization. I hope this clears up our issue of assaulting my door before knocking. Have a wonderful day!

Thanks,
Mandi Courington